The work is the portfolio.
Six services, six annotated rewrites — real edits, real reasoning, nothing invented.
Each pair shows a plausible piece of weak, generic copy and the studio's rewrite of it, annotated the way we'd mark up a client's own draft. These aren't from real client work — they're demonstrations, so you can judge the craft before you buy it.
Website copywriting
Before — homepage passage
Welcome to Acme Software. We are a passionate team dedicated to providing innovative solutions for businesses of all sizes. Our mission is to leverage cutting-edge technology to help you succeed in today’s competitive landscape. Contact us to learn more about what we can do for you.
- 1. Nobody buys “passionate.” Say what the product does.
- 2. Name the actual product. “Solutions” is the word you reach for when you won’t say what you sell.
- 3. Delete. This sentence would survive, unedited, on any competitor’s site — that’s the tell.
- 4. Ends on a question, not a decision. Say what happens next.
After
Acme tracks inventory across three warehouses in real time, so you stop shipping orders you can’t fill. Set it up in an afternoon. See your first stock count today.
Brand messaging
Before — positioning statement
We are a dynamic, forward-thinking company committed to delivering best-in-class solutions that exceed our clients’ expectations through innovation, collaboration and excellence.
- 1. Every clause here could sit on a competitor’s site unedited. That’s not a positioning statement — it’s a null result.
- 2. Banned on this site too. If a phrase doesn’t survive our own vocabulary rules, it doesn’t survive yours.
After
We build the accounting software for agencies that bill by the hour and hate spreadsheets. If you invoice a client for time, this replaces the spreadsheet you’re using to do it.
Landing pages
Before — landing-page headline & lead
Our platform offers a wide range of powerful features designed to boost your productivity and streamline your workflow. Sign up today and see the difference for yourself!
- 1. A feature list isn’t a reason to buy. Pick the one that matters and lead with it.
- 2. Two vague benefits standing in for one real one — merged, they cancel each other out.
- 3. The exclamation point is doing the persuading a sentence should be doing.
After
Stop rebuilding the same report every Monday. Connect your data once and it updates itself. See it live in two minutes — no credit card.
Email copywriting
Before — subject line & opening
Subject: Don’t Miss Out!!! Check Out Our Latest Offers
Body: We wanted to reach out and let you know about some amazing deals happening right now. Click here to explore our full catalog and find something you’ll love!
- 1. Urgency with nothing behind it reads as spam before it’s even opened.
- 2. Banned phrase, and it says nothing. Just tell them what’s in the email.
- 3. One offer, one link. A catalog is a maze — nobody clicks a maze.
After
Subject: The jacket’s still in your cart — one size left
Body: You added the field jacket in medium three days ago. It’s down to the last one. Finish the order — it takes about a minute.
Complete your orderSEO content
Before — article opening paragraph
In today’s fast-paced digital world, businesses are constantly looking for ways to leverage content marketing to drive engagement and boost their online presence. Content is king, and creating high-quality content is more important than ever before.
- 1. Delete the throat-clearing. Nothing is lost.
- 2. Says nothing a search engine — or a reader — can use.
- 3. Banned phrase on this site too. It also isn’t true anymore on its own — structure and intent-matching do the actual work.
After
Most B2B blogs rank for a year, then quietly disappear from page one. The ones that hold their position share three things: a real search-intent match, a structure a crawler can parse, and internal links that tell Google what the site is actually about.
Content retainer
Before — recurring blog post opening
As we continue to grow and evolve as a company, we remain committed to providing our valued customers with the highest level of service and support. In this blog post, we’ll discuss some tips and tricks for getting the most out of our product.
- 1. Three sentences of throat-clearing before the actual topic arrives. A reader gives you one line before deciding to leave.
- 2. Vague enough to fit any product. Say what the tips actually are, in the headline.
After
Three settings most people never change — and the one that cuts your setup time in half.